The “C” Word

In 2014, I was living in the beautiful city of Santa Fe and working as a photographer for travel blogs and magazines.

I started having severe insomnia.  I was finally able to get an appointment at a sleep center.  Immediately, the doctor suggested that I follow up with an eye doctor (because my vision had changed) or a neurologist.  

On a Friday, I had an MRI.  By Monday, I was diagnosed with brain cancer.  I was treated with steroids in the hope of shrinking the tumor.  I remember Thanksgiving, but then my time frame was sketchy, and I have blank areas in my memory.

There was an emergency surgery because the tumor was crushing my brain. They told my family that I may not make it, and they couldn’t confirm what damage would be done.  

It ended up being a traumatic injury.   I couldn’t walk, talk, read, write, feed myself, and I was blind.  I remember being in the hospital.  The nurses would leave the TV on for me because I was afraid of the darkness.  Weeks later, in the middle of the night, I remember seeing blobs, splotches, and blurry images of colors.  My sight was returning!  The colors were so bold, vibrant, almost psychedelic.  

I then remembered that I had a camera on my cell phone, an iPhone 4.  I started taking photos.  It was easy because there was only one button.  

I had so many rounds of chemo that I lost count, and a lot of OT, PT, and speech therapy to follow.  

I HAD to return to photography — it’s what saved me.  Except that the Nikon that I was using had too many buttons and lenses.  I was confused a lot. So I bought a simple snap-and-shoot.  A few months later, I upgraded to a Nikon CoolPix 900.  

Note:  These photos are unedited because I needed to relearn Adobe again. 

Maui had been my pet who became my service dog, constant companion, and best buddy.

My video tribute to her.

The medical team in Santa Fe stabilized me, but I needed further treatment.  My only real option was to move. 

I received a stem cell transplant at Tufts Medical Center in Boston in July 2016.  It would take me a year to recover fully.  The one-year lease was up, so I bought a house on the North Shore, drivable to Tufts, where I received many follow-up MRIs. 

To pay it forward, I signed up to mentor two cancer support groups.  I was interviewed by the ABTA (American Brain Tumor Association) for their monthly newsletter.  I wrote an article for PetaPixel, “Relearning Photography After Brain Cancer, Shot by Shot” (May 2019). 

“I’ve been called ‘inspirational,’ but I was only trying to live.” — Lane

I could finally focus on photography once again. 

Note:  This is my first photograph taken with my trusty old Nikon.

I had to relearn every button and every dial.  My subject matter was my new home, the North Shore.  

Then I had to relearn Lightroom.  

I never forgot those splashes and blobs of magnificent colors while I was regaining my sight.  Colors and contrast are now my focus, and I find peace and solitude in the Great Outdoors, leading me to Expressive Nature.

I recently moved to Columbus, Ohio, to be near my daughter. I will be exploring the parks and wilderness in central Ohio.  

Note:  I still suffer from aphasia and aphrasia, so I will do my best to edit notes properly.